[10] Not a move.Even her expression hadn’t changed. Her breaths however were coming faster and faster. Then the battle began. I had to do it. I had to have a throat culture 8 for her own protection. But first I told the parents that it was entirely up to them. I explained the danger but said that I would not insist on a throat examination so long as they would take the responsibility.

[10] 她還是一動不動，連表情也沒任何變化，只是呼吸越來越急促。于是戰斗開始了。我迫不得已。為了保護她，我必須給她做咽喉細菌檢查。但首先我告訴她父母，完全由他們來拿主意。我把危險解釋給他們聽，但是，只要他們愿意承擔責任，我不會堅持做喉嚨檢查。

[11] If you don’t do what the doctor says you’ll have to go to the hospital, the mother admonished her severely.

Oh yeah? I had to smile to myself. After all, I had already fallen in love with the savage brat, the parents were contemptible to me. In the ensuing struggle they grew more and more abject 9,crushed, exhausted while she surely rose to magnificent heights of insane fury of effort bred of her terror of me.

[11] 你要是不聽醫生的話，你就得上醫院!母親語氣嚴厲地訓斥道。

噢，是嗎?我不由暗笑。父母雖然可惡，我卻已經喜歡上了這個小兔崽子。在接下來的搏斗中，父母變得越來越卑鄙討厭，體力不支，精疲力竭，而她由于對我心懷恐懼，仍用盡全身力氣拼命地掙扎。

[12] The father tried his best, and he was a big man but the fact that she was his daughter,his shame at her behavior and his dread of hurting her made him release her just at the critical times when I had almost achieved success, till I wanted to kill him. But his dread also that she might have diphtheria made him tell me to go on, go on though he himself was almost fainting, while the mother moved back and forth behind us raising and lowering her hands in an agony of apprehension 21.

[12] 父親盡了最大努力。他塊頭很大，但畢竟是自己的女兒，他既為她的行為羞愧，又怕傷到她，于是，每每在我快要成功的關鍵時刻，他就撒了手，最后我都恨不得殺了他。但是，他也擔心她可能得了白喉，所以又叫我繼續，繼續，雖然他自己差不多都暈倒了，母親則在我們后面走來走去，一會兒抬起手，一會兒又放下，焦急萬分。

[13] Put her in front of you on your lap, I ordered, and hold both her wrists.

But as soon as he did the child let out as cream. Don’t, you’re hurting me. Let go of my hands. Let them go I tell you.Then she shrieked terrifyingly, hysterically. Stop it! Stop it! You’re killing me!

Do you think she can stand it, doctor! said the mother.

You get out, said the husband to his wife.Do you want her to die of diphtheria?

Come on now, hold her, I said.

[13] 把她抱到膝蓋上，我命令道，抓住她兩只手腕!

他剛動手，孩子就發出一聲尖叫。不要，你弄痛我了!放開我的手，我叫你放手!她接著歇斯底里地大叫，叫聲令人恐怖。住手!住手!痛死我了!

您看她受得了嗎?醫生!母親說道。

你滾出去!丈夫對妻子說，你想她得白喉死嗎?

得了吧，抓牢她，我說。

[14] Then I grasped the child’s head with my left hand and tried to get the wooden tongue depressor between her teeth. She fought, with clenched teeth, desperately! But now I also had grown furious--at a child. I tried to hold myself down but I couldn’t. I know how to expose a throat for inspection. And I did my best. When finally I got the wooden spatula behind the last teeth and just the point of it into the mouth cavity, she opened up for an instant but before I could see anything she came down again and gripping the wooden blade between her molars she reduced it to splinters before I could get it out again.

[14] 我左手緊緊扳住孩子的頭，試圖把木制壓舌板塞到她牙齒之間。她咬緊牙關，殊死搏斗!而這時我也變得怒不可遏了——對一個孩子。我努力控制住自己的情緒，但做不到。我知道怎樣讓人張嘴檢查喉嚨。我竭盡全力。終于，我將木制壓舌板伸到了她最后一排牙齒后面，木板頂部進了口腔，她的嘴張開了，不過只有那么一瞬間，我還沒來得及看到任何東西，嘴又合上了，沒等我取出壓舌板，她臼齒緊緊咬住板緣，將它咬成了碎片。

[15] Aren’t you ashamed, the mother yelled at her. Aren’t you ashamed to act like that in front of the doctor?

Get me a smooth-handled spoon of some sort,I told the mother. We’re going through with this. The child’s mouth was already bleeding. Her tongue was cut and she was screaming in wild hysterical shrieks.Perhaps I should have desisted 10 and come back in an hour or more. No doubt it would have been better. But I have seen at least two children lying dead in bed of neglect in such cases, and feeling that I must get a diagnosis now or never. I went at it again. But the worst of it was that I too had got beyond reason. I could have torn the child apart in my own fury and enjoyed it. It was a pleasure to attack her. My face was burning with it.

[15] 你不害臊嗎?母親沖她大喊大叫起來，在醫生面前這樣你不覺得害臊嗎?

給我拿把平柄勺過來，我對母親說。我們得把這事干完才行。孩子的嘴已經開始流血。她的舌頭破了，可還在歇斯底里地尖叫。也許我該住手，過一兩小時后再來，這樣無疑會更好。但是，我已經見過至少兩個情況相同的孩子因疏于治療而死在床上，我感覺必須現在給她診斷，否則就永無機會了。我又開始干起來。但最糟糕的是，此時我也失去了理智。盛怒之下，我恨不得把那孩子撕開了享用。向她發起進攻讓我感受到快感，我的臉也因此變得火辣辣的。

[16] The damned little brat must be protected against her own idiocy, one says to one’s self at such times. Others must be protected against her. It is a social necessity. Andall these things are true. But a blind fury, a feeling of adult shame, bred of a longing for muscular release are the operatives 11.One goes on to the end.

[16] 這種情況下，人人都會對自己說，這可恨的小兔崽子雖然無知，但我們必須保護她，保護她也就是保護其他人，這是社會的需要。這些話固然都不錯，但釋放身體力量的欲望往往讓人產生盲目的憤怒和成人的屈辱感，這些才是關鍵所在，它讓我們一意孤行。

[17] In a final un reasoning assault I overpowered the child’s neck and jaws. I forced the heavy silver spoon back of her teeth and down her throat till she gagged. And there it was--both tonsils covered with membrane. She had fought valiantly to keep me from knowing her secret. She had been hiding that sore throat for three days at least and lying to her parents in order to escape just such an outcome as this.

Now truly she was furious. She had been on the defensive before but now she attacked. Tried to get off her father’s lap and fly at me while tears of defeat blinded her eyes.

[17] 在最后一次瘋狂的攻擊中，我控制住了孩子的脖子和下巴。我將重重的銀勺強行從她的牙齒后面伸入喉嚨，直到她作起嘔來。果然，她兩個扁桃體都覆蓋著膜狀物。她一直奮勇搏斗，就是為了不讓我獲知這個秘密。喉嚨痛這個秘密她至少隱藏了三天，她向父母撒謊，就是為了逃避這樣一個結局。

現在她真的憤怒了。之前她一直在防守，現在她開始進攻了。她掙扎著要離開父親的膝頭向我撲來，眼眶里盈滿了失敗的淚水。

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